Merry Christmas, Cooper

Dear Cooper,

I'm sorry I didn't get you any toys this year and I'm sorry that I didn't take the time to include you in my holiday shopping. But, let's be honest and realistic, you don't have any concept of holidays and technically, everyday is like Christmas to you anyway.

Since the holidays are days you should spend with your loved ones, I'm glad I'll be spending Christmas with you. Just like we have for the last 3 years, you have been the only sense of family I have during the holiday season and well, everyday. So I want to thank your mischievous, apathetic, lazy, low energy ass for being my companion, source of entertainment, and the bane of my existence all rolled into a 30 pound doggy frame. I love you, Choo Choo.

P.S.--I did order you those organic extra thick bully sticks you love so much. Please return the favor and poop quickly instead of making me walk you for miles in this snow. Thanks.

Apathy

Last night Tyson and I were wrestling around and Cooper was sleeping in his house like always, not giving a shit even when I squealed out in pain. Tyson noticed and said, "Most dogs go ballistic when their owners are wrestling around with other people" and I replied, "Yeah, Cooper couldn't care less what happens to me."

My first dog Sari would literally go bananas when anyone hugged in front of her, pretended to hit each other, or mimicked any kind of physical contact. She would wedge herself between us and try to push us apart and she was the kind of dog that never jumped up on anyone. I can't even imagine what she would do to a stranger that was doing anything physical in front of her to her family; I would imagine that she wouldn't have a problem with biting them and bringing them down.

Cooper really could care less. Whenever I'm sad or cry, he slinks off into his house like, "Ugh! You're doing that again?! Jeez, I'm going over there until you stop that nonsense." If I wrestle around with anyone, he cocks an ear over and looks at me out of the corner of his eye like, "oh, she got this." If heaven forbid, I actually get attacked, Cooper wouldn't do shit. He would jump up on my attacker like, "Oh my God! A new friend! I love you!" He's a terrible guard dog and companion. The only thing he has going for him is that he is so gosh darn cute.

Nightmare

About a week ago, I had a really bad dream involving murderous, vindictive orcas and humpback whales. I guess I was whimpering or something in my sleep because after I woke myself up with a loud gasp and fighting for air, I looked around the room wildly because I had that terrible, strange feeling that someone was in the room. Incidentally, I forgot to lock my door the night before so if there really was someone in the room, it wouldn't have surprised me.

Anyway, I kept sensing that something was at least staring at me so I put on my glasses and peered around only to have my eyes land on Cooper who was standing on his hind legs with his front paws on my bed staring at me like, "...hi?" It really freaked me out because he was staring so intently at my face like, "were you having a bad dream? You were making weird noises so I decided to come and stare at you until you woke up. It was all a dream...go back to sleep now...it was all a dream..."

Ugh, so glad Cooper can't talk...

Slip and fall

We got some snow over the weekend which semi-melted, which then froze into sheets of murderous black ice all over the sidewalk. You would think living downtown, someone would at least shovel a path on most the sidewalks but alas, I am woefully wrong. Cooper and I must carefully pick our way through treacherous patches of death.

I always thought animals would have better grip on the ice; maybe it's their toenails or the fact that their weight seems to be more evenly distrubuted on four paws than my two clumsy feet, but I guess assuming things is bad. Cooper always joyfully runs into the snow banks without worrying about the slippery ice while I try to hang on for dear life without being pulled down and rolling my ankles.

Anyway, while Cooper was walking merrily along and I was walking with my head down trying to take baby steps, Cooper slipped on a patch of ice and skidded into the side of a building. It was the funniest thing I have ever seen and the look of shock and fear in Cooper's eyes as he was slipping was hilarious. True, I am a mean dog owner for laughing at his downfall but that's what he gets for being cocky on the ice. And besides, he was fine. Nothing was bruised but his ego and that needs to be taken down a few pegs in my opinion.

After I laughed at him, Cooper refused to look at me and I could tell he was dying of embarassment until I hit a patch of ice, slid a few feet while yanking on his leash. He actually stopped, looked over his shoulder with a look of concern on his face. Can you believe that? It's Cooper for the love of god, half the time he doesn't even bother getting off the bed when I come home. Anyway, the look of concern on his face melted my heart. You can almost hear him say, "Oh jeez, are you ok? Man, it is slippery out here! Let's take our time..."

Daylight savings

Now that it's daylight savings and winter is upon us, it is getting darker more quickly. I don't like walking Cooper when it's dark out because I live in a somewhat unsafe neighborhood and although there are people outside at 5:30, it's dark and scary and I get easily intimidated. I get home around 4:30 and I try my best to give Cooper at least a half hour walk.

This is not long enough for him. Cooper has become destructive in the house while I'm at work, sleeping, or at the gym. He normally chews and tears up trash, but it's gotten to the point where he will hurl his body at the bathroom door to get into the trash and when I come home, there's tissue and everything else scattered all over my place. I also worry that he eats some of the trash and it might cause a blockage.

I leave bully sticks out for him to chew on as well as those teeth cleaning chews. He goes through them quickly and loses interest. I try playing with him inside the house to burn off some energy. If he would actually run, I would run him around the block once or twice to really get him going. Instead, I try to walk as briskly as possible, sometimes even dragging Mr. Man behind me as I try to persuade him to exercise instead of tearing/eating/chewing on things inside my place.

Luckily, he hasn't gone for shoes anymore. He leaves all the electrical cords alone. He has left my iPod alone (and trust me, if he chewed that up Cooper would be dead). It just pisses me off when he eats bathroom trash. Stupid, stupid Cooper...

Bless you!

Whenever Cooper sneezes, and he does so every morning, his tail uncurls. It's so cute. It's even cuter watching his tail curl back faster than you can blink.

Playing god

It's weird that I never really thought of this until last night. I was sitting there playing with Cooper and I realized that I have complete control over his life. I pick what time he gets to eat, go outside (unless he really needs to go), when to play, when it's ok to sit on the bed, etc. I mean, it goes as far as neutering him so he can't have babies.

I don't know why that hit me all of a sudden and coming to that realization made me realize how completely dependent Cooper is. I know people get dogs as a child replacement or whatever, but I don't know how anyone can think that of dogs or cats. I think it's because some people like knowing that something else is totally dependent on them and that they'll always be needed.

For the commitment-phobe that I am, it makes me a little nauseous to think of how much Cooper depends on me for. So I'm going to pretend that I'm not playing God to him and that Cooper has as much free will as he thinks he does.

Go away

Cooper has been doing well lately; his allergies are improving and now that we're having a bit cooler weather, he seems to be in a better mood.

I guess the change in weather and the fact that all the things that Cooper's allergic to are dying is contributing to the fact that Cooper seems to have more energy. He hasn't played fetch or tug of war for awhile because he was too busy being miserable and scratching himself. Lately he will run over to his toy box and grab his frog or Wubba and entice me to play with him. It's really nice to see him with more energy.

As for everything else, I think he's pretty happy. He's been sleeping back on the bed with me and has taken to sleeping right under my hand so I am petting him all night; or at least he thinks he's being petted. I'm just glad to know that my little Choo Choo is happier with fall coming. :)

Happy Birthday, Choo Choo

Cooper's 3 today :) Wow...they do grow up fast...

California's burning

Who knew that the wildfires in California can wreak havoc all the way to Colorado? Lately it has been smoggy and the skies have been opaque in Colorado. All the extra smog, ash, whatever in the air is making Cooper's allergies near unbearable for the little guy. No matter what I do, he still tries to scratch himself in vain.

His right eye is almost swollen shut, his muzzle is red and raw, and his poor wee paws are swollen and red. Poor Choo Choo :( Nothing I can do offers any kind of relief. Even when he sleeps, he wakes up frustrated scratching himself and making terrible moaning noises. Even I am suffering from all the extra pollutants in the air; my eyes are just really dry and itchy and I don't even want to know how bad it must be for Cooper.

All in all, as I'm expecting another wildfire in California next year, I just hope that the entire fucking state burns down so we don't have to deal with it next year.

Boyfriends and dogs

As I've been going on dates recently, some of the guys have stopped by my place so I can either change my shoes or pick something up. That means they get to meet Cooper for better or for worse. As Cooper likes everyone who walks in the door, it usually goes well but sometimes Cooper's in a bitchy mood and wants everyone to know it. His allergies have been really bad lately so he's always in a bad mood. I don't blame him.

Anyway, I dated this guy a long time ago names Chris and he was jealous of Cooper mostly because Corey got him for me and he was "our" dog. Cooper didn't really care much for Chris either; usually he ignored him like he ignores me. One time Chris yelled at Cooper to get down from a chair and Cooper didn't want to so Chris grabbed him by his collar and knocked him off the chair. Yeah, I broke up with him soon after; no one mistreats my dog but me.

Cooper met Tye a few days ago and although he woofed at him, he didn't really care. He sat on the bed and cuddled with him and I thought that was kind of cute. There was this show on VH1 where a woman wouldn't date someone if her cat didn't like that and I thought that she was fucking crazy. But then, I thought about it and maybe animals have some 6th sense when it comes to people. I mean, Cooper's is way off since he likes the homeless and the meth heads, but I don't think I can date someone who didn't like Cooper.

Second chances

As we all know, Michael Vick got signed by the Eagles now that he's out of jail. In a lot of ways, I'm so glad that he went to jail for a long time and lost millions of dollars in endorsements because it sets a good example of "who cares if you're a celebrity" and to shed a little more light on dog fighting. Also, most importantly, that if you get caught, you'll be fucked; probably worse than Vick because you won't have the money to hire the high-powered lawyers.

What he did was appalling. It was terrible and unfortunately, it is done everyday by thousands of ignorant tools who do not deserve any sympathy or even the love from an animal. Normally I'm not a pitbull fan, I think they're scary and most of the people I've seen who have them only keep them as pets to make them feel more masculine. Pathetic. However, I don't believe that any dog should have been put through the kind of abuse that those dogs inflicted on each other just for the entertainment of assholes who should be euthanized and neutered so they don't create more ignorant miscreants.

I think it all has to do with the upbringing of a person. It just goes to show that you can take a person out of the trailer park but you can't take the trailer park out of the person. Even with the privilege, money, power, and fame, Vick went back to his old "roots" of a poor kid growing up in ghetto-like conditions. I hate people who bring up their upbringing as an excuse for their behavior; you have all the opportunity to change yourself and get yourself out of the ghetto (which sometimes makes me think why we waste so much time and money on people who can't grasp this concept).

Anyway, I do believe in second chances, however. I don't think Vick is 100% remorseful for his actions; I think he's more upset at having to re-create his image and to prove himself as a football player rather than a respectable member of society. I think, in fair retribution, that half of his earnings should be donated mandatorily to animal welfare groups, the Humane Society, rescue groups, etc. I know he'll have a lot to prove and to gain the respect back, but I highly doubt that he will even consider giving up his millions as a way to gain some kind of retribution. Unfortunately, I think he only has money on his mind and most likely, he only cried himself to sleep in prison because he was in prison; not because of what he had done. He was probably cursing the dogs and getting caught for his horrific actions.

Oh the places he will go...

Sometimes I wonder if Cooper has an imagination, and if he does, what he thinks about. When he was a puppy he would hold a toy in his mouth and trot around the house for about an hour with the most pensive look on his face. True, he might have been debating on where to hide the toy but the manner in which he was walking made me think of a little kid armed with a backpack and the threat of running away to find his own adventures.

Sometimes Cooper stares out the window for hours. Normally, this wouldn't bother me if I actually had a view, but as I stare at the side of the adjacent building, I wonder what Cooper thinks about. I hate how scientists assume that dogs are simple and incapable of having any kind of higher thinking; I like to think that Cooper dreams, daydreams, and imagines great possibilities.

Which got me thinking, what would a dog daydream about? Treats? Another long walk through a park he hasn't been to in awhile? Wistful musings of days that have passed? Yearning for more stimulation? Perhaps he contemplates his existence, loneliness, or maybe he thinks of more optimistic things such as, "My mom will be coming home soon and then she'll give me treats, love, and a walk!"

Since Cooper's rather on the emo side, I think he thinks about random emo subjects. What those are, I don't know, but I'm sure he composes poetry in his head.

Allergies and Sneaky Weight Gain

Last Friday Cooper had a vet appointment for a bordatella booster and to check up on his allergies. Thankfully, this year wasn't as terrible as last; I didn't have to bandage his paws to keep him from chewing on them.

Anyway, once we got into the vet and Cooper tried in vain to get back outside, the vet techs weighed the little guy while my chest puffed out in anticipation to hear them say, "He weighs 25 pounds!" Instead, I hear, "Cooper's 30 pounds!" My jaw literally hit the floor and I had an incredulous look of fury and disappointment that everyone noticed. I let out a loud, "Oh, Cooper!"while Cooper sat there on the scale, blinking up at me.

I honestly thought with his diet and ridiculous daily walks that he lost weight. He also blew out his coat and is looking sleeker, slimmer, and skinnier. I was so upset, he hasn't had treats in forever, I try to walk him longer and twice on weekends, and still, the little porker actually gained weight. I have no idea how that happened. God, I have to have the fattest shiba known to man.

Ugh, besides me disgruntled rumblings about his weight gain and not loss, Cooper's pretty healthy overall. He doesn't have mites or a weird skin condition, thanks to the switch to a grain free diet, his allergies have been consistently seasonal. The vet gave us a different medication and that'll hopefully sort out his problems. Cooper's now on a vitamin supplement for Omega 3 fatty acids and all I have to say is I'm glad that I gave Cooper jelly beans. He doesn't seem to notice a difference and just eats them like he eats jelly beans. Thank God because I don't think I can shove a pill down his throat and hold his mouth until he swallows.

Mr. Kim and Cooper

My brother is in town for about a month and he's staying with Cooper and me. Cooper's met him over Christmas last year and seems to semi-remember Mr. Kim. They get along really well and I'm glad that Cooper has some company while I'm at work.

My brother said that the first day he was here and I left for work, Cooper started howling and crying about 5 minutes after I left. He said Cooper was standing by the door scratching, crying, howling and making a ton of noise. Luckily, Mr. Kim was able to shut him up relatively quickly so no one should have complained. It kind of made me smile; Cooper misses me to some degree.

This morning, Cooper was curled up next to my brother while I was getting ready for work. It was super cute :)

Dog Sitting

Isn't it weird that, as owners, we think our dogs are near perfect? Or maybe it's because we're used to all the little quirks and idiosyncrasies our dogs have...either way, David likes to complain about Cooper and I complain about his dog, Leila.

I know Cooper has some problems; he walks too slow, will hold his poop for days, willingly makes himself sick, screams and cries when something annoys him, and generally doesn't like other dogs. But, he knows basic commands, is super easy going, not too mischievous anymore, and has the general apathy that I have come to love.

I feel like Leila could be a better dog with better training. I guess the same could be said about Cooper, however, since he is my dog, I feel like he's I dunno, I guess 80% trained. He knows not to jump on strangers, spit things out when you tell him, and is completely housebroken and I know I won't need to worry about accidents unless he has a terrible, terrible stomach ache. He is pretty good at holding it until I get home, and I love him dearly for that.

I read that the average trained dog has a vocabulary of 160 words. I think Cooper knows around 60 or so words for sure, 10 he knows but chooses to ignore, and the rest is all gibberish to him. He knows a few commands in Korean and I feel like that should count for two words.

Anyway, my brother's coming to visit for a month which will give David a break from watching my little drama queen.

Pigeons

I was walking Cooper yesterday when we came across a pigeon with a broken leg and wing. I wonder how that happened; it must be a treacherous life to be a pigeon in the city. Anyway, this was not Cooper's first encounter with a damaged pigeon. With his first encounter, he ran up to the flailing pigeon only to back away from it, screaming, when it started flapping more frantically in Cooper's face.

This time Cooper ran up to it, very excited, tail wagging, and a grin on his face. The pigeon flapped away a few feet, Cooper followed, and the pigeon flapped away again. This time in his pursuit, Cooper accidentally stepped on the pigeon. It gave a loud coo and Cooper took a few steps back with a horrified expression on his face. He held up the paw that stepped on the pigeon as the pigeon lay there, quietly waiting to die. All I could think about was Cooper's frame of mind and I'm sure it went something like this:

Cooper: "Oh my God! A friend! Wanna come over to our house? You can see my toys! Wait, come back, I just wanted to ask you a question...oh, so you wanna play chase? OK! Oh my God! I am so sorry! Are you ok? Oh goodness, I didn't mean to step on you, geez, you're not moving...are you ok? Um...maybe I should leave..."

Pigeon: "Oh God, please have mercy on me. Oh God, please don't...Oh God, just kill me now while I have some dignity left."

Alas, Cooper and I walked off on our merry way while the pigeon, who knows, I'm sure something came along and put it out of its misery or maybe it fell into the street. All I know is, Cooper could never kill anything. He just wants to be friends with pretty much any animal he comes across. He accidentally killed a fly once and I never saw him look so sad.

Just because...

I love Cooper and need to take more pictures of the little guy.

Here he is lying on my bed watching TV. Ah, to live life as dog...

And yet another shot of how Cooper always has the best seat in the house. He's not allowed on the pillows but I couldn't scold him since this is such a cute shot of the little furry monster.

He's a Boy!!!!

I swear, everyone thinks Cooper is a girl. True, he has sharper features and he likes to prance around, but he is a BOY! And he's not gay! He's a-sexual!

Everyone teases me about Cooper or strangers will come up to me and ask, "Oh what a beautiful dog! What kind is she?" while I glare and reply, "He's a boy!" Good Lord, can they not see that he's a boy?!

Granted, he is a mama's boy and likes to sniff flowers and can't fight worth a damn, but he is a boy...perhaps I neutered him too soon before his masculine features fully developed...

Inclement Weather

Denver's been having almost nightly tornado warnings. It really got me thinking about emergency situations in which Cooper might be alone in the apartment while I'm trapped downtown. Being me, I worry a little too much, but I think this is legitimate.

I had a nightmare a few weeks ago that a tornado hit downtown and I was trying to get home to save Cooper. Of course, I woke up before I even got to my place, but I don't know, what would I do? What would Cooper do? I'd like to think that some of his instincts are still strong enough to help keep him semi-safe. At least make him hide under the bed or even somewhere safer.

Yesterday was really scary; the tornado sirens were going off every 15 minutes or so. Cooper started pacing around and jumped into my lap and stayed there for about half an hour. I got really scared seeing him act that way; he doesn't ever sit in my lap for anything. I thought for sure the tornado will touch down but luckily, it blew to the north and we were ok. I guess yesterday made me think that I should have an emergency pack made up specifically for Cooper. Just in case.

Shocking

I feel so bad right now that I want to go home and take care of Cooper. Because of constant complaints from the neighbors, I gave in and bought a shock collar for Cooper last night at Petsmart. I had to test it on him to make sure it works and it was the saddest thing watching him get a shock. It's annoying to hear him bark and he doesn't bark like a normal dog; it kind of sounds like one long yell/shout thing. And he keeps that up for hours. I don't know if he's lonely, scared, what, I don't know but I had to do something because leaving the radio on or the tv on doesn't seem to have an effect on him.

He's a fast learner so I'm hoping he'll figure out that when he barks, it's a bad thing and he'll stop barking on his own. I just feel like a bad person fo getting one of those collars.

You Can Come Inside, But You Can't

Cooper's a relatively easy going dog who loves everyone. Anyone that walks in through the door is his new best friend for life. He greets them a thousand times better than the way he greets me; tail wagging, shiba grin on his face, and ears pinned to the side of his head. However, I have noticed that there are certain people that he seems to almost hate. He turns into the ideal watchdog by growling, barking and baring his teeth to try and get that person out of the house.

OK, so I've only noticed this behavior with one or two guys; one was a cable guy who completely ignored him and hurt his feelings and the other is my friend Austin. Granted, Austin doens't really come over often but when he does, Cooper will not stop barking at him. I don't know why he does that; maybe it's some weird alpha thing. Austin usually teases Cooper by barking back and that just pisses off the little guy even more.

Side Note: it's actually super cute watching Cooper get mad. His "angry face" is so darn cute and I don't know how anyone can take him seriously when he's scrunching his nose and narrowing his eyes. Usually he gets frustrated because I laugh and tears into a toy and wringing it within the last inch of its life.

Anyway, Austin came over yesterday and I kept Cooper in his house. He was fine, didn't bark, whine, or really, make a single sound. What a weird-o.

Traveling

I have a lot of business trips coming up in the next couple of months. Luckily, most of them are short, 3-4 day trips but that means I'm having to leave Cooper almost every other week. David can usually dog sit but now he's on the project as well and I'm having a hard time finding someone willing to watch Cooper.

It's not that he's a horrible dog to take care of but he is dog aggressive and he tends to bark when he's feeling lonely and bored. I'm thinking of boarding him but I really don't want to do that. I'm hoping that some of my friends will be willing to watch him; most of the time, David and I aren't scheduled for the same sessions.

When I went over to David's last night to pick Cooper up, it was the first time that he jumped into my arms and started whining and crying. I think he was super excited to see me and finally go home since he was staying with Mitch for awhile. It was sweet and I liked that he missed me but I feel terrible because I'm leaving again soon. Plus, I think that the constant back and forth of bringing him to different homes is going to drive him crazy. He's really good at adapting to new surroundings but I just don't want him to be stressed out.

Oh well, poor Cooper. At least I have a whole week to spend with him before another trip :)

Barking, Hoarding, and Trimming Nails

Usually I can trim Cooper's nails if I have someone holding him. Since I live alone and David's too timid to hold Cooper, I have to resort to tricking him into staying still. I like to ask him to do tricks and reward him and then I trim a nail or two when I say "shake" and he gives me his paw. He freaks out because he finally realizes what happened and will scream and run away for a few minutes before he forgets all about it. Lately I've been teaching him to "relax" (lie on his side) so I can trim away.

I don't have problems with his back paws. I just cradle him in my lap while crooning, "Good boy!" as I clip away. I have more problems with his front paws and especially his dew claws. I knew I should have gotten those removed when we got him neutered...anyway, I tend to give up and trim just 2 of his nails on each paw. It works out ok. I wish he was smart like Sari and even Pickle and just grind his nails on the sidewalks.

Lately he has been barking/screaming/howling whenever I leave the apartment and he's not with me. On work days he seems to be fine and I don't hear him but on the weekends, good god...I already had the neighbors complain twice so I don't know what to do. Whenever I leave him on the weekends or even weeknights, I fill his Kong with kibble and treats and hope that'll suffice. I don't want to buy a bark collar because I don't think they'd work on him and if I got him that citronella spraying crap, I just know it'll get all over my stuff and I hate the smell of citronella. I would get a shock collar but I know Cooper would scream and that'll just shock him with higher voltage. So I'm hoping that the Kong will work long enough for my neighbors to go on with their lives and actually go to work. How the hell do I get that one neighbor that never works or even leave the house for that matter?

Cooper has a tendency to hide things in his house. I remember I had a 6 pack of those snack size yogurt raisins and I couldn't find them for a week. I came home and Cooper drops a box of the raisins at my feet and looks up at me like, "hey, you should open this and give me one..." I was stunned and asked, "Cooper! Where did you get this?!" He gives a guilty look at his house and I knew that's where he was hiding them. He looked so worried when I dug them out. Luckily he didn't open any of the boxes or I would have had to take him to the vet. Apparently raisins are bad for dogs.

Sometimes he hides toys in there. I once found some socks and underwear; both Corey's and mine.

Cooper

I can't tell if Cooper misses Corey or Pickle. Corey came over with Pickle on Sunday and while Cooper was excited to see Corey (he loves everyone who walks through the door so this isn't that big of a deal) he didn't seem to care much for Pickle. Or even recognize him for that matter. They just sniffed each other and Cooper wanted to play but Pickle was too freaked out by new surroundings to want to do anything.

My brother thinks Cooper is the most expressive dog and I think so, too. You can almost read his mind based on his facial expression. I like having an expressive dog but sometimes when he's just lying there watching tv or drifting off the sleep, I can't tell if he's content. I'd like to think that he is but how can I know for sure?

He's been barking a lot when I leave the house and the neighbors have complained. I don't want to get him an anti-barking collar because they're super pricey and I don't think they'd work anyway. He usually doesn't bark in the house when I'm home but he'll woof at the door when people are being loud in the hallways. I think he might be bored or lonely so I'm going to buy him more of those Kong toys and randomly fill them with treats and his dog food so he doesn't gain too much weight. I hope that'll keep him occupied long enough that he doesn't care when I leave because then he'll get Kong filled treats.

It makes me feel guilty in some ways when I go out after work or on the weekends. I feel like I should take care of him or do something with the dog but I can't take him everywhere with me and I don't want him to be more co-dependent. I have a problem of worrying about everything around me and I worry that Cooper feels like he's being abandoned or I worry that he's lonely. He's not really human so he might not even feel or think that way. I guess it's that mother/nurturer in me that's worrying about those things.

Anyway, he seems happy. He likes his own space and not having to share the attention and treats.

Death

On a creepy note, after I posted that last post last week, Mitch's dog Lola died. He came home and found her lying on the floor with a floor lamp on top of her and blood and diarrhea everywhere. Apparently she had a stroke and while she was still alive, he had to put her down because she had so much damage and would be a vegetable.

She was a rescued/retired greyhound that was 12 years old. She was never properly potty trained so he would constantly come home with pee and poop everywhere. She also was a counter surfer and broke countless amount of his dishes. She also whined all the time; seriously, the dog whined all the time. But, Mitch had her for 6 or 7 years and it's hard to let go of anything even though he hated her at times.

It made me worry about Sari. She's almost the same age as Lola and I keep freaking out about her dying. I know it's inevitable but I don't want her to go. I haven't seen her for 3 years and I'm praying that she can hold out long enough for me to see her one last time. My brother says she's doing all right but you know, she's getting older and doesn't want to play as long and sleeps all the time. He says he freaks out when he sees her laying still for too long and goes to wake her up to make sure she's still alive. I'm dreading that phone call that I know will come sooner or later.

My brother and I joke about winning the lottery and getting her cloned. It would be worth every penny to get that dog cloned although we also wish we could get a time machine and just keep her as a puppy all over again. I just hope that I can see her soon...

Cooper has a heart condition; he has a small hole in his ventricular walls that happened at birth and it may or may not cause him a shorter life. The vet thought it was a heart murmur until I got it looked at and I guess this hole in the ventricular wall is a little bit better than a murmur. I still think, because I'm paranoid, that Cooper won't have as long a life as any normal shiba. Although I didn't want a shiba in the first place, I can't imagine my life without Cooper and I sometimes worry about going home and finding him dead from one thing or another.

Post-Secret

I saw this on Post-Secret:

I honestly believe that I spoil Cooper and let him get away with so much because of my guilt for my first dog Sari. Sari's the most amazing dog/companion anyone could ask for and she really deserves so much more than what she has had in her 11 years of life. I really wish I could keep her with me but because she's lived outdoors her whole life, living indoors would cause her to become destructive. Plus she's semi-aggressive and over-protective which wouldn't be a good thing when you live downtown constantly surrounded by people.

She's the best dog I could ask for...she always knew when you were sad and wanted to sit next to you and lick you to make you feel better. She never stepped on me or jumped on me because she seems to be th eonly dog who understood that dog paws hurt when they step on you. She always made me feel safe when I went for walks because I knew she wouldn't let anyone or anything hurt me.

I couldn't wait to graduate and finally start making my own money to spend it on her. But she moved to Washington with my dad and spends her days in the constant drizzle growing older. I miss her and I haven't seen her in 3 years because I just don't want to see my dad. If there was a way that I could see her without putting up with my family drama, I would totally jump on that chance. She's a great dog and I'm afraid that she'll die before I can see her again.

Phone

Sometimes I honestly think that my phone will ring and when I answer it, it'll be Cooper on the other line asking, "When are you coming home? I'm bored...and I'm hungry. Hey, whatcha doing? When are you coming home?" I know it's super ridiculous but I really believe that if Cooper could magically grow thumbs and speak, he'd call me every other minute wondering what I'm up to and why he can't be with me at work.

Weight Loss

At the advice from my vet, Cooper has been on a diet since January. She advised that I give him a cup of dry food a day instead of the 1 1/3 cups I was normally giving him. I was just following the feeding guideline on the side of the dog food bag for Cooper's weight range. From what the vet said, the dog food companies tend to overestimate the correct amount so the consumer runs out of food faster. Those assholes...no wonder so many dogs and cats are getting more and more obese.

I suppose that wouldn't really matter if you had an active dog and active lifestyle. From my musings past, I didn't walk Cooper at all in suburbia and only took him to the park when the weather was nice. Cooper being the ever lazy dog he is wouldn't run around as much as Pickle nor really, run at all. Although we had a mild winter in Colorado, I just couldn't bring myself to walk the dogs through the nasty muddy fields and walking both Cooper and Pickle by myself was really the most frustrating thing I could do because of Pickle's circling and nervousness.

Anyway, now that Cooper and I are back downtown with ample sidewalks, he and I have been going for at least a 45 minute walk everyday. The weekends, twice a day. I still only give him a cup of dog food and he hasn't had treats in I don't know how long. I know it's only been about 2 weeks since moving downtown and it might be too soon to tell, but I think Cooper's losing weight. He doesn't walk very fast but at least he's moving more. He's shedding and is poofier than normal so I'm hoping that once he blows his coat I can see the weight loss if there is any. My scale broke so I have no idea if he is losing weight or not.

I was in denial about Cooper's weight for awhile I guess. He never looked "fat" so how was I supposed to know? I couldn't compare him to Pickle because Pickle's a twig but come to find out, Pickle's the exact weight a male shiba is supposed to be. I saw Jackson and he looked like Pickle's body type and mass and only then did I gasp and realize that Choo Choo is a little porker. He weighed 27 pounds when we last took him to the vet. He needs to lose at least 5. I noticed that his collar was tight on him too and I blamed that on his super thick coat. Ah, denial...maybe I shouldn't be a parent because if I can't even find the flaws in my own dog, how am I going to find flaws in a kid? In my eyes Cooper's perfect and I know he's not. He's probably the worst dog ever and it's my fault of spoiling that little fucker. If I could start over from the beginning, he would end up the same. It's not that I'm a bad dog owner, I just let him get away with stuff and I'm not consistent.

Anyway, Cooper enjoys his walks although he likes to walk at the leisurely pace of an old man with a cane or walker. I'm constantly tugging on his leash to make him walk faster especially when we're crossing the street. Plus he has to stop and make friends with everyone who walks by us whether or not they're obviously a crazy person. It's frightening and I try to make him ignore them but he won't, he knows he's cute and wants everyone to know that.

Mellow Yellow

According to my friends who haven't seen Cooper since I moved to Lone Tree, Cooper has mellowed out. Who knew? To me he has been the same dramatic, bitchy little queen since the first day I got him. And I love him for that.

Anyway, my friend David was staring at Cooper when he came to help me move and Cooper was jumping on him and leaning against his legs asking for pets. I guess thinking about it now, Cooper is a little more affectionate. He still barks at strangers which is a good thing; I like nice dogs but at the same time I want a dog that'll at least try to be intimidating sometimes. Megan came over yesterday briefly and Cooper wanted to play fetch with her.

Perhaps the person's opinion that would affect me more is Fox's. Fox has had shibas in his life and currently has one named Jackson (who is the perfect dog in every way; Fox refers to him as the "broken shiba" because Jackson can be trusted off leash, comes when he's called, likes to cuddle, etc.). Fox noticed that Cooper is a lot more calm, mellow, and affectionate. I guess I can't see the difference because I'm around him all the time.

I don't know what that means. Maybe Cooper has finally matured into a calm adult dog and he's no longer a moody teenager dog. I swear, if he was a real boy, Cooper would be the most emo kid alive. Cooper's still a dick at times though, no way would he ever be a "perfect" dog and I accept him as he is. He still pulls too hard on his leash for the first 5 minutes and after being worn out from dragging me, he lags behind and tries to make me carry him.

This is a picture of "emo Coop" from about a year ago. I really should take more pictures of the little guy.

When I take him out for walks, everyone notices him and says, "oh! What a happy doggy! Look, he's smiling!"

I guess he is glad to be downtown and away from Pickle after all.

Cooper on Capitol Hill

For the most part, I am completely moved into my new place. Sure, I have about 3 boxes that still need to be unpacked but it's filled with books and I'm not in a huge hurry to unpack those. Plus, I don't have book cases yet.

Anyway, Cooper seems to be enjoying downtown again. He really is out of shape though, he gets tired and starts lagging behind after 4 blocks. Now that I really look at him, he is a little on the chubby side. I'm hoping that constant walks for at least an hour and a diet will help him lose some weight. I'm also not sure if it's because he's shedding right now and is "poofier" than normal. Either way, he needs to lose a few pounds and get back into shape, that lazy dog.

I can't tell if he misses Pickle though. Cooper just sits on my bed and naps all day and when I come home from work he's usually either in his house or on the bed staring at the door. I started to worry that maybe he's depressed but thinking about it, when I came home to my old place with Pickle, Cooper would be lying on the couch anyway. I don't think he's bored; he never played with Pickle much when they lived together. He seems happier though, he likes his daily walks and I'm sure his stress levels have gone down since he doesn't have an overenthusiastic Pickle in his face all the time.

I'm dog sitting for my friend David and at least for this weekend Cooper will have some dog company. I still worry about Pickle and I hope the little guy is doing all right.

Farewell to Pickle

I know I haven't written in quite some time. Mostly because I've been depressed but Corey and I broke up again and I am moving with Cooper this weekend. We're moving back downtown and I think Cooper will be fine with the move. Ironically I'm moving into my old apartment complex so it's not like I haven't been there before. In some ways I'm glad I'm moving there because Cooper and I already know the area really well and really, at some point it'll feel like we never left.

I'm going to miss Pickle like crazy though. I've had him for 8 months and watched him come out of his shell; at least around Corey and me. I'm going to miss his happy-go-lucky attitude and his quick, speedy responses to whatever I ask him to do. I'm going to miss the way he would curl up next to my legs whenever Cooper wasn't on the couch with me.

Because this is a bad split, I told Corey I want nothing to do with him but he insists on using me to dogsit Pickle for him when he goes out every weekend. While I can see his point since Pickle has an intense fear of strangers, I don't want Corey relying on me to watch his dog so he can skimp on his responsibilities. In my opinion, I think forcing Pickle into social situations might help him get over his fear. Of course I could be horribly wrong but I really don't think I can handle having to see Corey all the time.

Pickle has always been the kind of dog that wants to know what you're doing. If I go to the bathroom, he's one step behind me. Even if I close the door he opens it somehow (I suspect that the latch doesn't catch all the time) and sits in the doorway or on the bath mat. One time while I was showering I looked down and saw Pickle staring at me through the curtain. Kind of creepy when you're almost legally blind without glasses or contacts. Lately he's been staring at me with his big brown eyes and they look so sad. He has the puppy dog eyes down and it's really pulling on my heart strings. I just see his cute little face and it really breaks my heart knowing that he might not be well taken care of. A part of me wants to take care of him but the other part really doesn't want to have to put up with Corey. I know I'm being unfair to the dog but at some point we need to break contact. I don't think I'm at fault that Corey doesn't have any friends that he feels like he can trust to watch a dog for a day or two.

I know Cooper will be tons happier without Pickle. We've been keeping them seperated and Cooper just basks in the glory of having his own space. I feel bad for Pickle because he's always sitting outside the bedroom door whining and pawing at the door while Cooper growls at him from the other side.

Who knows, maybe I'll be the bigger person and take care of Pickle just this once but I really don't know, I'm so conflicted and the one who has to pay is Pickle.